Use these 5 Steps for In-Law Harmony
Geez, I just skipped right over Tuesday. What are Tuesdays for anyways. They are not the beginning of the week, not the middle, not the weekend - they are just kind of useless. Thinking about this just gave me an idea - I need to add something fun to Tuesdays (besides this awesome newlsetter) to make them not so blah.
How about a Tuesday Date Night? Why wait until Friday?
Interested? Check out this site for some fun ideas on date night ideas that you can do inside or outside of the house: www.thedatingdivas.com
Now, what I promised you last week - how to get a long with your in-laws. This is a tough subject - I know from personal experience! However, I'm going to try to break it down into some bite size pieces so you can start building better relationships today!
- Set Boundaries in Love - I'm talking about boundaries, not walls. Boundaries can protect our families from outside influence if we use them correctly. You can set boundaries by knowing what you want and knowing what you don't want. Want to learn more about setting boundaries - check out: Boundaries by Henry Cloud.
- See It From Their Perspective - You and your spouse probably grew up a little (or a lot) differently. You each have your own family culture in which you grew up. When you got married, you developed your own family culture together - and your parents may not understand, like or appreciate your new culture. This is okay, but just understanding that it is different for them may help tremendously.
- Ask Questions and Ask For Advice - The best way to start building relationships with your in-laws is to ask them questions about themselves, their past, their parents, their interests, etc. Also, asking them for advice and taking the advice is a great form of flattery. Don't be fake about this, try to show real interest. If your mother-in-law doesn't treat you the greatest - maybe asking her about her relationship with her mother-in-law will bring some light to this subject.
- Do Not Talk Badly About Your In-Laws (especially to your spouse) - We all know that our family does not always act the best, or does things to bug us. However, if you call them names, constantly criticize them or blame your spouse for their actions - it will hurt your spouse. Remember, this is still his/her family that you are talking about, and even if your spouse doesn't agree with their choices, there still is a sense of protection.
- Remember You Are A Team - You and your spouse are a team and have to remain a team, especially when setting boundaries and protecting your family. If you allow a family member or friend to come between you, then you have lost the battle.
Start using some of these tips and let me know the changes that you see by commenting below.
Also - don't miss my November blogs because I will be tackling the #1 challenge in all marriages.