I want to take a quick minute to thank you for being part of this awesome community. A place where we can learn new ways to love our lives, our spouses and our children more and more!
It brings me so much joy to be able to help women and couples every day re-discover their spouses and create a marriage and life they adore - and one in which they feel adored!
This bring me to the topic of the day...
How can you have it all?!
How can you spend quality time with your spouse, your children, grow in your career and still have time for you?
As you probably know, I'm a wife, mother of a two-year old and four-year old, and entrepreneur. It can get crazy! There was a time when I was working over 75 hours per week, and finding time for my kids and my husband was tough….much less finding time for myself.
I don't believe in life-balance.
Maybe it's just my way of rebelling against my Libra's astrological symbol of the balance scales. But honestly, I don't ever want to "balance" my family and my work. My family always holds more weight.
So, I developed a different concept - I call it Life Harmony….
Think of your favorite song. Think about all the different instruments and voices that have to be in sync to create the harmony. Sometimes one instrument will take a solo, sometimes all the instruments will be playing the same chord….there are crescendos', ups and downs…
To me, this is what life is all about. Each part of my life represents an instrument in my song. Sometimes my husband has the solo, sometimes the kids, sometimes my work --- and sometimes I have my own solo. Other times, all these instruments need to harmonize together to create the chorus. There are ups and downs - but there has to be - or it would be a boring old song.
So, how do you harmonize your life? How can you have it all?
You decide what is important to you, what your values are, what your goals are - and you make these things you main instruments. Then get rid of all the other stuff that doesn't serve you - or is not in alignment with your values, dreams or passions.
Want a simple (but not easy) way to do this?
This exercise is life changing - but it takes time - and is a little bit of a pain in the butt. BUT - it works!!
Step 1 - Make a list of your core values. Here a list of common core values to get the juices flowing.
What is really important to you? What desires, passions and goals do you have?
Step 2 - Create a Time Log
For the next three - five days write down everything that you do every 15 minutes. I mean everything - yes, when you check out Facebook for 15 minutes, this better be on your log. When you chat with your co-worker for 30 minutes, this will be on your log. EVERYTHING!
Step 3 - Cross it Out
Grab your core values list and your time log. Look at your time-log and put an "X" next to every activity that does not mesh with your core values, or does not help you reach a dream or a passion. Be tough here - if the activity does not directly relate to a core value, dream or passion - put an "x" next to it!
Step 4 - Take Inventory
I'm going to take a guess that there are a lot of activities that do not fit your core values. If you were to remove each of these items from your daily activities - how many extra hours would you have during the day? How could you fill this time with activities that are within your core values? Did you find some extra time that you could spend with your spouse, or children, or get some 'me-time'?
Step 5 - Make a Small Change
Each week, make a conscious decision to replace one of you "X" activities with an activity that meets your core values. For example, if one of your core values is spirituality - replace your 15 minutes of tweeting with 15 minutes of prayer, meditation, mindfulness, reading, etc.
Make one small change each week - and soon your day will be filled with activities that are fulfilling, purposeful and satisfying.
I would love to hear about how this activity has helped you and what small changes you are making today. Just comment below.